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Forgive Me… I’m Trying to Forgive You

/ Cat Harvey / Leave a comment

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One of my favorite quotes is:

“Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself”

When I was checking on the source for this quote, it looks like Suzanne Somers gets the most votes.  We had Tony Robbins in the mix, along with TD Jakes.  Well, it deserves deep consideration, no matter who authored it.

I’ve held a grudge.  I’ve fed it and nurtured it.  I’ve felt the burn. The person holding the grudge will always feel worse than the target of the anger and resentment.  If you are stubborn and slow to forgive, it will always hurt you more than anyone else.

I know it takes so much effort to forgive immediately and with sincerity, but the pay off is huge!

While we’re on the topic of forgiving, it’s okay to hold yourself to a high standard of ethics or morality.  But, we are human, and sometimes we hurt other people, even if we don’t mean to.  Be quick to forgive yourself in the midst of your guilt trip.

The usual form of an apology is:  “I’m sorry that I got angry, BUT….”  Make your statement and then stop.  Don’t qualify your feelings and take the argument to the next level.  If you have a fight with a friend, both parties should apologize.  That’s what friends do.  It’s called making up.

Resolving a rift between friends can put you right on the mountaintop.  It feels blissful to bring restoration to a broken relationship.  You’ll be wondering why you waited so long!

Just a word of caution.  Remember, that while your feelings of forgiveness towards someone may feel right to you, they may take time to bring a resolution.  Your words and gestures of apology may not be returned right away, if at all.  Forgive anyway. You can only control your side of the equation.  This is something that we must learn from.  It’s part of life.  This is what it means to be accountable; to accept the consequences of your actions.

Who can you forgive today?  Give yourself a gift and get started.

– Cat

What’s Your Superpower?

/ Cat Harvey / Leave a comment

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Photo by Tyler Lambert

Superheroes have been around for a while, but they are more popular than ever!  Lots of popular movies and  TV shows tell the story of a Superhero, or sometimes a group of them.

 I’m not one that’s caught up in the Superhero media craze. I like to celebrate everyday people who develop their own superpowers.  We each have at least one personality attribute that can be used for good, which we know can defeat evil, right?

I’ve used this exercise before, in encouraging and demonstrating individual strengths in the workplace.  As part of a team, you might not have patience. If you know the person next to you does, you can turn to them for help and advice when you need to.  If I’m feeling down, but I know your positivity is infectious, I can hang out with you until I’m all powered up.

But enough about everybody else.  Let’s talk about you for a minute.  Take some time right now and think about your superpower.  What’s the one thing, the one strength you have, that we can all rely on to make the world a better place.  Is it your smile, your sense of humor? Is it your determination, your tenacity?  Is it your helpful attitude?  Your quest for knowledge? Are you a good listener?  Empathetic?  Humble?

I’ve given you a few examples, now it’s up to you to put the concept together.  You see, your special gift is what helps you contribute to this group project we call life.  By developing and putting your talents to work, you improve the planet.

Every once in a while, I run across someone who tells me that they don’t have a superpower.  They don’t recognize any talent or gift within themselves.  So, it’s safe to say that positivity is not their strong suit.  If you’re in the club of naysayers, ask someone you love, or work with, maybe someone in your family…. Hey, do I have any superpowers?

Chances are, you’ll get them thinking about their own superpower, while they’re helping you get yours figured out.  Once you do this exercise a few times, you’ll start noticing other people’s talents with a sharper eye.  Before you know it, we’re all going around appreciating each other!

Okay… maybe I took that a little farther than I should have.  But the point is, we can grow and learn through this exercise.  Try it.  I’ll bet it won’t take you much time at all.  I’m thinking that you’ll have a hard time narrowing it down to just one.

Let me know how it goes!

-Cat

Bombing Our Way Into Peace

/ Cat Harvey / Leave a comment

Veteran’s Day is almost over.  I’m thankful for every person that’s ever worked to defend our country.  I’m thinking about this:

I wonder if most people make up their mind to be “for” or “against” war.   I think it really depends on the situation.  I think it’s unrealistic to think that we can put an end to war.  It seems we’ve been beating each other up over the ages, probably before we could walk upright!

When Albert Einstein wrote to President Roosevelt, he tried to persuade him that the atomic bomb should be built.  He later said that he regretted his decision to make the appeal.  At the time, he was afraid that Germany would develop nuclear capability.  Although Einstein wasn’t directly responsible for building the bomb, it was his work that made it possible.  And there is the letter.

Although most people are horrified at the thought of nuclear weapons, there are differing opinions on whether it was the right thing to do to end World War II.  There is the argument that by bombing Hiroshima and wiping out half its population, around 180,000 people, we prevented many more American casualties, possibly in the millions.  We shortened the war.  We ended the discussion.  This also ended Russian aggression in the area, for a time.

On the other side of the argument, there are those that say that the war would not have gone on for much longer anyway.  We had the upper hand, and were winning the battle.    We went way too far and took too many innocent lives when we dropped the bomb.

The thing that makes me suspicious is the timing.  We bombed Hiroshima on August 6th, and then bombed Nagasaki  three days later on August 9th.  Didn’t the bombing of Hiroshima send a direct enough message to Japan?  Did we wait long enough to see what the response would be?

As I was looking into this question, it appears as though I had it backwards.  I seems that actually, we didn’t continue on to Nagasaki.  We stopped at Nagasaki.  We were prepared to keep going.

Can we actually bomb our way into peace?  Can we fight one last fight that settles things? We could start a group of representatives from countries all over the world and work together for the common good of humankind.  We could call it the United Nati…nevermind, that will never work.

I’m grateful for the sacrifices that veterans, and especially their families, have made for me, my family, and my nation.  Thank you for your service!

  • Cat